we thought we had no spare time left

Prospective apprentice Is it feasible for a man or woman with a career, children, and family obligations to practise Vajrayana? I am increasingly interested in the Nyingma Tradition and in the Aro gTér in particular – but until recently I have always held back because of the sense in which I could not do justice to what would be involved in making a serious commitment.

Lamas We are neither here to encourage or to discourage you – but this statement seems to be a serious statement which does justice to what would be involved in making a serious commitment. Serious commitment is a matter of intention – and that intention can exist throughout the day—every day—whatever else is taking place. To be a Vajrayana practitioner—particularly when the emphasis is on Dzogchen—concerns living the view in every moment. This is actually far more demanding than forms of commitment which are more tangible. To practice from the perceptive of Dzogchen is to integrate the non-dual state with every aspect of existence and so there is no person who could ever be excluded. In terms of Dzogchen one is either self-included or self-excluded. However – the choice is yours and you need to make it according to as many considerations as seem necessary.

Prospective apprentice I have heard for example, that solitary retreat is necessary if one is to progress as a practitioner – and I cannot quite see how that would be possible for anyone who lives a working family life. Do you have apprentices in my position – and if there are, do they find they are able to make use of the teachings to any great extent?

Lamas We have a fair few married apprentices with careers and children and some of them are our best students. Some indeed are now brevet Lamas (Lamas in training) with responsibility for their own apprentices. Be that as it may—we have no desire to convince you of anything, one way or another—and it would be preferable if you were to engage in your own research amongst our apprentices at a public retreat. You can meet these people and enquire directly as to the nature of their experience. We usually advise people to do whatever inspires them most – or whatever fans the flames of their ardour. Some times it is not relevant whether something is practical or not – it can be more a matter of doing what moves you despite the inconvenience or impracticality. For example – we thought we had no spare time left in our lives – and then we started riding horses. Now we have two horses and ride twice a week on average.